I'm in York motherfucking Pennsylvania.
Where there is absolutely nothing to do o__o;
I can't say that I haven't been enjoying myself. I'm grateful that I've made some friends, including my roommate. I don't party, because honestly I don't trust anyone. Classes have started, and I think I'm going to do pretty well. Sure, some are a bit intimidating *cough* academic writing*cough*, but otherwise it's okay.
I miss home terribly, I miss my family so badly. I was finally able to cry after getting off the phone with them. I think the shock has finally passed. Also, I am seriously ACHING to see my legit real friends. JESUS. I MISS YOU!!! I hope you all miss me too...D:
Anddd then there is Blaise.
-Side story: I have found that I am more faithful to Blaise than I ever thought possible. I don't even SEE these guys that are trying so hard. Like, this one dude. He knows I have a boyfriend yet he's still pressing. It's really unattrative, I don't like it. I'm so terribly infatuated with my boyfriend, nothing changes that. I'm not naive about it either. It would be TOO easy for me to cheat on him and keep it a secret, but I would never do that. I'm incredibly happy with him, and this long distance thing is SO inconsequential. He's coming up to see me this weekend, I'm so elated about that fact. I'm getting a little piece of home, and finally affection will be there apart of my life. I miss it. I miss him.
No one gets my fucking jokes.
No one hugs me.
Honestly, they do not necessarily understand me either.
I feel like a stranger still, I feel like I'm on the outside looking in. I'm trying to give everyone a chance, but I'm starting to wear myself thin. I've never been an excessively social person, and recently I see myself as someone I do not recognize. Being this "friendly"(faaaake.fake.fake.fake) is sickening. I don't know what I was really expecting, to be honest. After being in a school where everyone was family, this environment is so strange. Everrrrybody is the SAME. And it's all about getting drunk and or high. I don't know, I used to be accustomed to it. Everyone I USED to associate with did so many drugs I couldn't even count, but after 4 years at BMAC, it's kind of shocking.
And did I mention that everyone is the same??
ZOMG HOLLISTER GAIZ!
NERRRGH.
But, then again I'm overgeneralizing, like I said, I'm meeting some cool people...for the most part.
Oh well, I'm trying not to get to down about it. I really want to enjoy this experiance, but yesterday night I was just miserable. I'm trying to get past it though...
*heavy sigh*
